I have made some pretty big changes in my life but feel nothing much has really changed at all.
Sold a home in California and bought a home in Minnesota. Everyone asks the same two questions, do you have family there or did you move because of work? And the answer to both questions is, no. So why move?
What I hope to do is start writing again. My desire is to pull myself up and continue on the path of a life I have yet to fully live.
Shaking off the past for an unknown future seems foolhardy to some but the truth is, I prayed and this is where I felt led to go.
Have you ever needed a change in your life that others just could not comprehend?
It has been over a year since my husband past from this world to the next and I feel like I have kept myself in perpetual motion ever since. Now I am slowing down and his absence is a deep ache I cannot shake, no matter where I am, no matter how many miles I travel.
A Widows Lament~
In the mystery of tomorrow lies the memories of today,
Seeping in-between the cracks of a history that we made.
I don’t look for you, I don’t listen for your voice,
I avoid our memories
And the game of remember when’s is a painful past time I don’t enjoy
I try to out run the pain of the phantom hug or touch of your hand
With the busyness of a half life that keeps me in perpetual motion,
That leaves me empty in the sleepless nights
Conversations we once shared dance around my heart aching to be said
But die unspoken in the early dawn
Never touching air.
Your gone and I,
I am still here.